Faking Being Kind

My most recently posted article on ABC Online on the topic of Faking It entitled Faking Being Kind.

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“You stupid, stupid idiot. It’s not ok to make mistakes like that. You should be better at this.”

That scolding was served with venom in a present-day Australian school and for many students and teachers alike, vile self talk of this nature is an uncontrolled epidemic.

In a therapy session with a graduate psychologist, he asked me what would it look like if I showed compassion to myself. I was dumbstruck, flabbergasted, flummoxed. I could not think of a single thought or endeavour which could possibly meet that ridiculous specification. I racked the foreign frontiers of my brain looking for a skerrick of an idea which might answer my therapist’s question, but still nothing.

Continue reading….

Manners: The small things

I recently wrote this piece for ABC Open on the topic of manners entitled The Small Things.

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Meal made by a friend with love for Special Delivery
Meal made by a friend with love for Special Delivery

To say that it’s been a dreadful year for my husband and me is quite an understatement. Trauma crippled us. Trying to rectify the situation hammered us again, repeatedly. The darkness has threatened to pull us both under – sometimes at the same time.

The trauma and distress has been unbearable, with precious little relief. When your lives are decimated, but the demands do not cease, the impact of careless discourtesy – and the power of kindness – can be profound. Read more…